I imagined it as a scene from a movie. You would see a montage of me smiling and laughing; interacting with people who looked like friends or perhaps family. Playing quietly in the background, a bouncy, wordless song meant to convey positive vibes. But my voiceover would tell the truth: my life is a bottomless pit. Everything you see is either a lie or a memory of happier days. Maybe the happier days are a lie too, because the life I describe doesn’t sound like someone who is living. It sounds like someone running on empty. A man taking up space and drawing breath when he shouldn’t be. Someone who has judged himself guilty. Guilt-ridden and weighed down with shame and dread.
There’s no slow-motion or visual trickery.
Just the syllables that lead to a fade to black.
© 2022 Jeff E. Brown. All rights reserved.
Writing and Photography by Jeff E. Brown 