I was recently diagnosed with Small Fiber Neuropathy. Small fiber neuropathy occurs when the small fibers of the peripheral nervous system are damaged. Small fibers in the skin relay sensory information about pain and temperature. What this means for me is that my feet experience a very odd sensory combination of tingling, burning, numbness and pain. So, every moment I’m awake I feel this misfiring of neurons and the more I walk, the worse it gets.
I’ve also been severely depressed for fifteen years. Some doctors and researchers believe that chemical imbalances and miscommunicating neurons in your brain are to blame for it. I’ve tried all kinds of pills, ketamine and even, a bit ironically at this point, electroconvulsive therapy. Shocking my brain to get my neurons to reset. Now, I have my neurons breaking down in my feet in kind of a mirror of my brain. A constant reminder of the fact that not only my mind betrays me, but the rest of my body is following suit.
The long-term prognosis with neuropathy is quite grim, but not without a little gallows humor. When the burning and pain in your feet stop, many patients feel that the disease has stopped, but in reality that means the nerves in your feet aren’t working anymore at all. Which then leads to stumbling and falling and possibly the complete loss of mobility as the numbness moves up your legs. Fun times ahead.
© 2022 Jeff E. Brown. All rights reserved.
Writing and Photography by Jeff E. Brown 